Posts Tagged ‘Nuggets’

Sporting Choices

May 5, 2014

Being temporally fluent, let’s say, I am often sought after for my supposed objectivity. Recently, many have come to me wondering which team to support in a two-team town. For reasons which aren’t entirely clear, I always know who deserves your enthusiasm. Here are your instructionsn North American version:

1. New York: Mets (as opposed to the best team money can buy), Jets (because it rhymes with Mets, and they have a better logo), and the Nets (because they’re not the Knicks).
2. The Bay Area: the A’s (just ’cause), the Niners (everyone loves a miner), and the Warriors (only game in town).
3. Los Angeles: for baseball, neither (ain’t no such thing as Angels, and the Dodgers have Dodger fans); for basketball, neither (they’re in the same conference as the Nuggets, history’s most supreme team all sports considered).
4. Chicago: the White Sox (because the Cubs have Cubs fans).

I hope this helps you. Cavebot would like to remind you, friends, less time spent caring about your sports means more time caring about things which are consequential. Remember, fan is short for fanatic, and all things in moderation…


Revealing the Future

April 24, 2007

Since being time-wrecked here in the 21st century, I have decided that the authority of the Time-Travellers’ Code and Conduct Act (TTCACA) no longer applies to me. Thus, with great joy in my heart, I can reveal to you that history will consider the Denver Nuggets the Greatest Sports Team ever (tous sports confondus). Their victory over the San Antonio Spurs on Sunday night (and why a team from Texas is part of an American league, I will never understand) is a minor milestone on the path to the Glory That Will Be Theirs. Allez les Nugs!